Note: This was written for the Remembering Chakotay (http://voyagertalent.netfirms.com/chak.htm) contest. This is my first (completed) Trek fic, and I am a bigger fan of the fics than Voyager itself, so I am sure I've made some mistakes in terms of characters and continuity. Forgive me. To avoid such issues in my future stories, send me some feedback (jamorales@compqna.com) and tell me where all my mistakes are. You can find my other fics at (http://www.compqna.com/fanfics/), but unless you are into Japanese anime, Ranma 1/2 specifically, it won't mean much to you.

I would like to thank all the authors at Koffee Klub and New Horizons for feeding my interest in Chakotay fics. In particular, Maquis Leader (http://www.angelfire.com/scifi2/chakotay/index.html) writes a great fic, and influenced the way I see Chakotay and his interactions with Naomi and the other children (see the story Leaving Home for a good example).

Disclaimer: This future was created by Sir Gene, and the characters and situations are property of Paramount. No infringement is intended, nor any profit made.

Summary: We all know Seven's death would not destroy Chakotay, so why did the admiral think it had?  What was Chakotay's life like in the admiral's timeline, and how did he die?

Miral's Second Birthday

Naomi was nervous, but everything was going fine. She had held babies lots of times in the last couple of years, but she still remembered vividly the first time she held Miral and almost dropped her. She sat on the couch and supported little Charlie Dalby's head the way she had been taught.

She was still too young to baby sit on her own, but Commander Chakotay had told her that she needed to pay attention and learn how to take care of the younger children. As the children grew up, the older ones would become responsible for watching the younger ones. As First Born, she would be responsible for teaching the others.

Thinking of the others, she looked over to at Miral Paris and Tabor Natan. The two were busy playing with the building blocks Commander Chakotay had made for Miral, though they didn't seem to be building anything.

****

"Sam, Naomi is adorable," B'Elanna told her friend. "You need to get a holoimage of that for the album."

"The doctor is snapping away. I'm sure I'll be able to choose from several different angles tomorrow morning." Sam popped one of the appetizers in her mouth. "Actually, I think I'll take Charlie off her hands. I promised Mariah that I'd feed him, and I don't think Naomi's eaten yet, either."

As she walked away, Seven immediately took her place next to B'Elanna.

"May I have a word with you, when you have a moment?"

B'Elanna considered talking to Seven about being less formal, but decided against it. Chakotay had made some progress on that front, but occasionally Seven would backslide. It usually meant she was nervous about something, and it was easier to simply let her talk about it.

"What's up, Seven?"

Seven looked around at the guests before turning back to B'Elanna. "I have noticed your quarters seem rather small."

B'Elanna was taken aback for a moment. "Oh. Well, I guess they are. We thought about having it in the holodeck, but we didn't know we'd get this many people. Also it was easier than carting the baby stuff back and forth."

Seven did not interrupt, but it was obvious she had thought about it. "Actually, I did not mean they were too small for the party. I think they are rather small for your family."

"Yes, well, not much we can do about that - other than move into the holodeck."

"That would not be practical. I believe the best solution would be to move into larger quarters."

B'Elanna couldn't help laughing. "I wish we could. What space is available, though is spread all over the ship. We'd have to relocate too many people, especially during construction. Believe me, I've talked to the captain about it, and it's just not practical right now."

"Indeed. I believe my solution will minimize the impact on the rest of the crew."

"Your solution?"

****

"But I don't understand!" Naomi objected. "If Clown is important and the keeper of the traditions, why would Owl hit him?"

"Well, there are several kinds of clowns, and they teach different lessons, but they often teach by showing what happens when we break the rules or do something foolish. Like Koshari," Chakotay picked up a black and white wooden doll, "he shows us the bad side of eating too much. He usually has a big slice of watermelon. Do you like melon?" The question was for Naomi, but Chakotay looked around the circle of children as he spoke to her. They were all too young to really understand the story, but their attention remained clearly focused. As much as B'Elanna wanted to talk to him, she couldn't bring herself to interrupt, nor would the children have allowed it.

"Yes!" Naomi answered dutifully, and some of the others were nodding with her.

"Of course you do. But like anything, if you have too much, you get a bellyache!" Chakotay's hand darted out, and Miral squealed as he poked her tummy. "Some of the other clowns break rules and get out of hand - they get rowdy and maybe they fight, that sort of thing. That's when Owl," this time he picks up a green and blue doll decorated with feathers, "steps in to keep them from getting out of hand..."

As the children were called away for cake, Janeway stopped him.

"I didn't think Kachina were part of your traditions," she mentioned with a smile.

He smirked. "I never claimed them as my own. On the other hand, they are pretty effective as a teaching tool. We can afford to tutor Naomi for now, but in just a few years we'll have several kids ready for school. We need to start thinking about that."

"Speaking of the children," B'Elanna interjected, "I have something I want to ask you, old man. Do you know what Seven just suggested?"

"Well, I wasn't there," Chakotay replied with a broad grin, "but I have a pretty good idea. What do you think?"

Rather than answer, B'Elanna turned to Janeway. "Did you okay this?"

"Yes, she did," Chakotay tried to answer for the captain, but Janeway still had something to say.

"Since I don't what you're talking about, I can't tell you if I okayed it," Janeway pointed out.

"Seven wants to swap quarters with us," B'Elanna explained.

Turning to Chakotay, Janeway gave him a questioning look. "When did I okay that?"

"When we started talking about this, I suggested we use the same regs they use on the generational ships for reassigning quarters, and you agreed. They say, among other things, that if none of the affected parties object, family cohesion is a good reason for moving away from the more traditional cabin assignments. At the time, I didn't expect to be one of the affected parties, but it's still okay by me."

"Listen, old man, between your workshop and the extra equipment and work Seven brings home, you can't spare-"

"B'Elanna."

The slight change of inflection caught her attention and stopped her. They rarely used the correct pronunciations of their own names anymore. Even the computer didn't get them right, and the simple differences tended to confuse some people. For a moment she was much younger, and among people who understood the meaning of her name. He had done it for effect - he wanted her to feel younger, she was certain.

"This is not about Starfleet regs, and this is not a Maquis issue. This is about family, and you are part of my family. If we were back on Trebus, and you were starting a family, I would be proud to give you some of my land and help you build a home on it. This is no different. As a favor to me, please, allow me to do this small thing."

'Ouch,' Janeway thought to herself. 'What a guilt trip!'

"Chakotay," B'Elanna responded in kind with his name. "As if I could deny my family. Thank you."

**** ****

Nine Years Old

Naomi was feeling very grown up, and it wasn't even her birthday. Chakotay had asked for her advice on Miral's gift this year. It might be a small thing to some people, but Naomi felt like it was something he would normally talk about to an adult woman.

Chakotay had stopped making toys for Naomi some years ago, but she still received a handmade birthday present from Uncle Chakotay every year, as did all the Voyager children. This past year he had given her a wooden jewelry box with several designs carved into the sides and top. Miral had noticed, and she seemed a bit envious. Naomi had suggested to Chakotay that he try for a hair clip or perhaps some jewelry, as Miral had shown more interest lately in dressing up.

Chakotay had seemed at a loss initially. While he knew the all the children very well, as he should since he was in charge of Voyager's school, he still seemed out of touch with women at times.

In the time Naomi had known him, Chakotay had had three important women in his life.

He and B'Elanna had been family since before Voyager. At one time he was a regular at the Paris family dinner once each week. These days, however, Voyager was showing her age, and required more attention from her Chief Engineer. Joe Carey had died years before, but his role was never really filled, meaning that at any given moment, whatever the shift, either Vorik or B'Elanna was in Engineering. B'Elanna just didn't trust anyone else.

Chakotay and Janeway had been best friends, to the point of finishing one another's sentences. Their friendship had weathered arguments and tragedies, and more than one extended period of non-communication. These days, though, they rarely saw each other, and it had nothing to do with any disagreement. Since Tuvok's illness had forced him to take medical leave, the trio that ran the ship became a duo. Tuvok's position had been taken over by Mike Ayala, and he did the job well, manning the tactical station and commanding ship-board security. Tuvok did a lot more than that, though, and the command duo had reshuffled their responsibilities. The captain helped out in Astrometrics, where Icheb was working hard to do Seven's job, and lent an occasional hand in Engineering. Other than that, anything internal to Voyager, especially crew-related, fell to Chakotay. The commander still went on away missions, particularly the ones that promised to indulge his interests in archeology and anthropology. Also, while Ayala ran the Tactical station, the tactics were Chakotay's. Other than that, almost everything external to Voyager, such as supply gathering and negotiations, went through the captain. Tuvok had only been on medical leave for five months, and already the command team looked tired - Naomi figured they would have to make some big adjustments soon.

The third woman in Chakotay's life was, of course, his wife. Annika, or Seven as Naomi still thought of her, had been dead for years now. The commander had been very sad for months after, but he eventually moved on. For a while he said he needed to keep busy, but with all his new work, in addition to his counseling sessions and his work with the school, she sometimes wondered when he slept.

****

"Hey, old man!" Tom exclaimed, clapping Chakotay on the back.

Quietly Chakotay replied, "The word you're looking for is 'Elder.'" Then he took another bite of his cake.

"I guess it isn't as funny since you're actually old now," Tom shot at him.

"Tom!" B'Elanna cried, as she jabbed him in the ribs.

At the same time, Chakotay's tired expression morphed into a lazy little smile. "I'll still meet you in the ring anytime you like."

"Uh, no thanks."

Chakotay was over sixty now, but still a large and imposing man. What he had lost in speed he had gained in experience and ring savvy. B'Elanna and Ayala were the only ones that had ever considered a round in the ring as recreation. Fitting. Every student in the Voyager school was required to spend some time each week working with one of those three on physical fitness and combat.

"Anyway," Tom continued after a moment, "I just wanted to thank you for the gifts. Miral seems to love them. I didn't know you were working with silver these days."

"Well, I just started, really." He frowned, as he watched Miral running with some of the other kids. She was already wearing one of the clips. "Hair clips are easy, but they still came out rather crude. Hopefully I can come up with something nicer next year."

"Well, she sure liked them. Like I said, thanks!"

"Save it. Your daughter already thanked me, and you can't match it." Now his smile was smug and his eyes twinkled. "After all, how often does an 'old man' get a kiss from a pretty young girl?"

The three of them laughed and B'Elanna smacked him in the shoulder. "I'm going to start calling you 'old lech'!"

**** ****

Sweet Sixteen

Naomi forced herself to read a few more lines before before she looked at the chrono again. Icheb was due back three hours ago. Three hours was a pretty minor delay, as far as these things went. It should be a fairly simple survey mission to a small M-class planet. They did have some information about this area of space from some Starfleet deep-space missions. They were close to home now. They expected to meet up with a friendly ship in less than two months, and they should be home in just over four months.

The planet looked to be barren as a lack of water left most of the planet a desert, but there was a small chance of finding some useful minerals. Then again, Commander Chakotay must have seen something more in it. He had only shown a minor interest at the initial briefing, asking Icheb to get some holoimages if there were any interesting mesas or canyons. It was nice to see his interest. Chakotay had seemed rather lackluster lately. He still kept up with his duties, but he just seemed to be going through the motions. The last signs of life she had seen from him had been at her wedding where he had proudly given away the bride. He had even made the rings himself.

It seemed he had been going non-stop for years. The exhaustive pace the command team had set for themselves years before had gotten worse over the years. Chakotay and Janeway had been teaching academy-level classes for the past few years, making sure that the cadets could take over nearly any job on the ship. The classes had been curtailed now that they were so close. It seemed Chakotay had been right all those years ago when he talked about needing to keep busy. Now that his schedule had slowed down, he seemed even more worn out, he seemed older, than ever before.

Some of the other crew members thought he was still pining for Seven, but Naomi knew he had gotten over her years ago. She thought he was lonely. He still got out from time to time and socialized, but he didn't seem to connect with anyone. He would play pool against some of his students, visit Tuvok, have the occasional drink with Harry or Mike, and on special occasions he might eat dinner with the Parises. Icheb and Naomi even had him over for dinner once. None of those seemed to really ground him, though.

The man had seen his entire colony abandoned by the Federation, and his family had been tortured and killed. He had lost his wife, his best friend and his adopted family were busy with their own lives and duties, and he had even lost Tuvok after the two had finally forged a bond of mutual respect over the years. The losses were taking their toll.

He may have shown minor interest at the meeting, but by the next morning, before the shuttle could be launched, he had added himself to the away team. That earned a raised eyebrow from the captain but, whatever her thoughts, she didn't voice them.

Naomi decided to go up to the bridge and casually see if there was any status on the team.

The bridge was quiet as this was the middle of gamma shift. Ensign Sable was in the command chair. Cadet Dalby was at ops. Charlie glanced up at her and acknowledged her with a nod.

"No word yet," he said without prompting. "We're supposed to backtrack to them if we don't hear anything in the next hour."

Naomi figured there was little point in going back to her quarters where she would only worry in solitude. She logged onto the unoccupied science station and set about checking the current scans.

Janeway surprised most of gamma shift when she emerged from the ready room about twenty minutes later; most of them thought she was in her quarters. She looked a little dazed and disoriented, but her voice was clear. "Any word?"

"Nothing yet, Captain," Sable responded.

"Bring us about. Let's go find them."

About then, one of the lifts opened. B'Elanna and Miral stepped out.

"Is he...? Have we heard anything?" asked B'Elanna.

"Not yet," replied Janeway. "We're going after them now. What are you doing up here?"

"It's too late. He's already gone." Miral's calm voice seemed too soft.

Janeway looked closely at both of them. "Did you dream... too?"

"It wasn't a dream." Again, Miral was too quiet and too sure.

"I know Chakotay can do it without the Akoonah sometimes, but that's a first for me," B'Elanna marveled.

"It was a dream," Janeway disagreed. "It had to be."

"No, it wasn't a dream." Miral broke into a tearful smile. "He even apologized for dying on my birthday."

"Who died?" Naomi broke in, unable to restrain herself any longer.

"Chakotay," Miral answered, using her mother's pronunciation. "His spirit guide told him his time was at hand, and that... we have to name that planet... that planet was his only chance to be given a traditional burial." She coughed out a sob. "He even told me he left my birthday present in his quarters. A cuff bracelet with stones that he thought looked like malachite."

Naomi looked at Janeway. Chakotay had visited her, he said something to her. Janeway's jaw was twitching and her eyes were full of tears, but none of them fell. Naomi knew without asking that the captain would never reveal what he told her. Janeway was still for a moment longer.

Cadet Dalby broke into the silence. "Captain, the Cochrane is hailing us."

"On screen."

Naomi released her breath when Icheb appeared on the screen.

"Captain, I regret to inform you that Commander Chakotay is dead." Icheb looked like he had had a long couple of days.

"How-?" B'Elanna choked on the word.

Icheb took a deep breath. "He died in his sleep. He didn't sleep all the way out to the planet - he flew the whole way. He said he hadn't flown in a while and was enjoying it. He seemed like his old self again. Once we arrived, he looked around and remarked on the beauty. While we unpacked the equipment, he took a seat on a rock and kept staring at the mountains in the distance. He said they looked like a range from Earth, called them the Sandias."

"The watermelon range." Miral's voice was small, and so was the smile coming through the tears.

"Yeah," Icheb perked up. "He said they were named because, when the sun went down over the desert, the red and orange color in the rock really came out, and the mountain looked like a big slice of watermelon." He smiled for just a moment. "He said he was tired, and went back to the shuttle to take a nap. When I found him, there was a padd with instructions. We buried him as he asked."

"You left him there?" Janeway asked, her voice incredulous.

"That is what he requested, Captain."

"He is coming home with us," Kathryn insisted.

"Captain -" B'Elanna started to object gently.

"No. He... his traditions..." She stopped to take a breath. "He has been buried according to tradition, we will just relocate the grave. We'll take him back to Trebus, or Earth if Trebus is still being re-terraformed. He will be buried... but he will not be so far from the bones of his people, not so far from the lands of his ancestors." She took a deep breath and let it out slowly.

"Ensign," she said at last. "Set a course for... for the planet Sandias. Maximum warp."

The End